16
Apr
10

NYIAS ’10: The Final Battle

So remember when I said I had a minute to breathe?  Well that minute is now gone and I am freaking swamped with school work.  I am writing this at 12:30am because I don’t have any other time to write this.  Plus I have friends coming up this weekend and I’ll be damned if I spend even less time with them.  Pray for me children, pray for me.  The next two weeks are going to be hell.

My final installment from the NYIAS has come and I hope you have been enjoying it so far.  If you haven’t, then there is no hope for you and your constituents.

I bring you Scion!

OoOoOooooOOO weee!!! The iQ!!!  This was one of the biggest reasons I went to the auto show.  I loved the 5Axis modified version last year and I couldn’t wait to see a production model up close and personal.

Although it took me about an hour to get close to the iQ because of all the aforementioned douche nozzles and tool bags.  It was worth the fact that I punched some old lady in the face to get closer to the iQ.  So worth it.  But all I heard around the iQ were people bitching about how small it was and how small the engine was.  News flash, don’t buy it if your fat ass can’t fit in it or it doesn’t accommodate your lifestyle.  I personally love these things and if I lived somewhere other than the rural country I would buy one of these.  The 1.3L will not fair well in the mountains by my house.  Although, I am very interested to see how these sell.

5Axis did up another iQ for this year’s auto show and boy o’ boy is this thing a looker.  I mean, hot dayumn!

Those are some really sexy wheels.  5Axis has a serious talent for wheels as well as a car’s aesthetics.

Oh my my, dat ass!  I think every cosmetic enhancement has been extremely tastefully done and flows very well.  Not to mention that colour is gorgeous.  I should roll up my tongue now.

Okay, one more.  *drool*

The new tC, no thanks.

I’m sure primer gray will be a hit with the kids.

Although, the 5Axis tC is very intriguing.  Very intriguing.

Love the over fenders.  They really add character to this bland machine.

Meh.  Not sure why those honeycombs could fit babies in there, but hey, whatever.

5Axis did one helluva job sprucing up the rear of the tC.  Because god knows it looked like hell before.

I just really liked this shot.

The xB2.2 has a rear I can really get behind.  Ha!  I had a front end shot but it looked like ass.  There were 10k people by this suv.  I have to say, the xB2.2 is really growing on me lately.

Now if you have read my reviews of the Scion booth people from years past, you know my distaste for them.  They had the same retards for a couple years and those ‘tards never knew anything outside of the script they were made to memorize.  They annoyed me every time I went to the show.  This year it looked like a whole new crop of people, to me at least.  I talked to the iQ guy at the 5Axis iQ and he seemed like an okay guy.  Chatted for a minute and he knew some stuff.  One of the Scion ladies at the counter was really nice and even knew what I meant when I said I own a “2005 Scion xB RS2.”  The dude she was standing with had no freaking clue.  Judging based off that, it looks like Scion brought out a good group of spokespeople this year, bravo.

Umm, so yeah.  Anyone want to give me $50k so I can buy this beast?  Anyone?

Just interesting to see one of these when they are not dinged to hell or destroyed.  I really dig it.

George Barris’ Monkees Mobile.

It’s like a giant Tonka Toy!!

Please, someone inform me why Kia thought it would be a good idea to use a dildo with measles to sell cars?  I mean, really?

Hands down, the coolest damn Kia I have ever laid my eyes upon.  “Purpose built race Kia” is not something I hear every day, or any day.

I bid you adieu with one of my favourite parts of a car: Dat Ass!

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8 Responses to “NYIAS ’10: The Final Battle”


  1. 04/16/2010 at 8:49 AM

    ROFL @ Dildo with Measles.

  2. 04/16/2010 at 11:33 AM

    ROFL @ Dildo with Herpes simplex.

  3. 4 Duane
    04/19/2010 at 9:08 AM

    Someone will have a turbo-charged hyabusa in the iQ in 5..4..3..2..1

  4. 6 *bj*
    04/20/2010 at 12:21 AM

    COOL COVERAGE BRO.

    No really, nice coverage!

  5. 7 Z
    04/22/2010 at 6:48 PM

    The dildo with measles is Muno, a character from the kidsshow Yo Gabba Gabba. It’s pretty trippy.


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